Doubts: Do they Kill you or make you stronger?

In the beginning of the journey to personal development, I had mounting doubts on almost every occasion. Whenever I set to accomplish a goal and the results didn’t turn out as expected, I started doubting. I was skeptical of my conducts. I doubted the principles. I was uncertain of my capacity to undertake decisions. I doubted the time I spent on the goals. I questioned whether I was on the right path in life. It was really disturbing, but every time I doubted, I read an empowering book and I got the energy to move on.

Thanks to the spirit of persistence, I finally got used to those troubling times. That marked a crucial phase towards growth and has led to profound changes on how I persisted towards attaining my goals.

“The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser men so full of doubts.” ― Bertrand Russell

This article discusses doubts. It discusses what doubt is, what is behind a doubt, and how it helps you. Then it looks on the negative side of doubts on how they distract you towards reaching your goals. Finally, the article suggests ways to deal and eliminate your doubts towards reaching your goals.

Doubts stem from “What if.”

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Doubts express uncertainties, worry, fear, or disbelief. In such a state, one is in a precarious position regarding their convictions on their goals. If you are in such a state, then don’t worry, doubting is normal and sometimes healthy. Similar cases happen to many others, and if you properly channel your doubts, they must thrust you towards success.

In my opinion, if you want to embark on a meaningful goal, then doubts are inevitable. When you dream big, you end up setting big goals. This is crucial to advance further, and some goals are so big that just the feeling of it scares you. In his classical book, Think and Grow Rich, Napoleon Hill listed six definite practical steps for transmuting desires into financial equivalent. His fourth step quotes, “Create a definite plan for carrying out your desire, and begin at once, whether you are ready or not, to put this plan into action.” Such is a way to obtain anything you want. I used these very principles in the course of writing my book, Your Inner Child Is Calling.

In such circumstances, doubts are inevitable because sometimes you embark on goals without skills or state of being ready for it. As you move one-step further each day, doubts crowd your mind. You question whether you are capable to accomplish your desires. You question your abilities. You question whether it’s possible.  However, with persistence and steady belief behind your desires, everything else falls into place.

At times, during the course of writing the book, I had doubts. When faced with such dilemma, I referred back to Napoleon, I regained the energy to move on. I was motivated. I persisted and took the proper action towards my goal. I finally proved that he was right, because my goal finally came to life.

Perhaps the best question is, are your doubts helping or weakening your efforts towards reaching the goals?

What really makes you doubtful?

It is your convictions. Yes, your beliefs and principles pertaining to your desires are key to raising doubts. The book Your Inner Child Is Calling touches on the subject of beliefs and I quote, “Beliefs are core foundations to success. It is true that people may give up on their plans to success over numerous reasons but belief in their convictions and desires takes a lead.”

Beliefs are core to everything in your life. In fact, they are essential survival skills to help you through life. Beliefs help you get along easily with your external environment. In short, beliefs  influence your decisions. They are not inherently bad, but the problems arise when the belief deters your progress when it contradicts with your heart’s desires. This is when beliefs raise doubts. If you are not very careful, this process might lead you to endless failures and procrastinations, but it really shouldn’t.

It is certain that doubts arise due to lack of strong faith towards your goals. You should know that your level of faith pertaining to your desires is seldom constant. Sometimes it varies depending on the circumstances you face, especially the ones which raise questions and doubts.

However, doubts are not necessarily bad to you; sometimes they are helpful towards reaching your goals.

How doubts help you?

 “It would make life much easier if I could have total faith and not question everything all the time, but I can’t do it and I won’t do it.” – Joey Skaggs

It is a fact that we can’t be doubtless. A small amount of doubt is necessary to make us face our lives and make conscious decisions about our everyday lives. Doubts have uses, especially for intelligent beings like humans. That helps us interact and understand our environment better using our intuitions.

  • Doubts improve your decisions

Doubts make you curious. Curiosity is good to find answers. In fact, with curiosity you get to uncover more about what you desire. It is ideal to question your desires before embarking on them. The more you question, the more doubts you eliminate and in turn that process leads to tremendous improvements on your final decisions.

  • Doubts are ways to evaluate your goals and clarify your convictions

When you raise a doubt, the curiosity allows you to evaluate yourself – You observe your actions – You observe your conducts – You clarify your convictions towards your goals. This is a crucial stage because it makes you analyze your desires from the different perspective. That gives you a good and clear picture on what to change in case there are problems and where to improve for better results of your actions. This way, doubt acts similar to a good evaluation tool.

The evil side of doubts

“Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win, by fearing to attempt.” ― William Shakespeare

Doubts are not negative, but how you handle them may lead to negative outcomes. Because of this, most of your doubts lead to detrimental results.

Doubts make you question integrity of others. Worry about life. Question your own beliefs. Doubts lead to stress. Doubts lead to frustrations, despair, and fear to embark on goals. This is detrimental if you don’t know how to handle your doubts.

Take a simple example, if you doubt your abilities to take actions and accomplish a goal, there is no way you can accomplish anything. Your mind, instead of focusing on your actions, it resorts to questioning everything, all the time. This way, you can hardly produce results, because you are uncertain of what you do. This kind of doubt is detrimental. If such doubt is not tackled, it results to adverse effects that lead to anxiety of embarking on similar goals in the future.

How to get rid of unnecessary doubts

This is really a question of how to purge limiting beliefs. Doubts are nurtured in the conducive environment created by your limiting beliefs. In such a case, it is wise to tackle the problem from the root cause.

Here are five ways to get rid of these beliefs:

  • Examine your doubts

Analyze the cause of your doubts. Where do these doubts come from? Are they solid or groundless? This process sheds light on the reason behind your doubts. With critical observations, you must come up with a good reason behind your doubts.

  • Prove it wrong

The second crucial step is to try to do what you doubt. There is no best way to eliminate a false doubt like proving it wrong. If it’s something that requires action, then do it. Refute its existence once and for all. If you can’t do it, don’t give up just yet, go to the following step.

  • Seek advice from someone who knows better

There are people who have answers to most of your doubts, find them. Ask them. Find someone you trust and who has expertise behind what you doubt. You will be surprised on how good this turns out. However, even after asking, I suggest you do the following step.

  • Try it yourself

When you have answers from experts or someone who knows better, then try it again. This is the best way to kill your doubts. Your doubts, once proven wrong, will never haunt  you again. This is crucial if you need to move ahead towards achieving your desires.

  • Analyze and purge your beliefs

As you have noticed above, beliefs provide rich soil for doubts to stem. So, beware of all the limiting beliefs and negative perceptions you harbor against your desires. If you do not know that, you will not solve your problem at all.  Ask yourself, what are the things you think you are not capable of doing? What can be a potential setback? Do you believe in what you desire? If there are any, try to see how to refute them. Only then you can be free with your life.

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